AMAZING LOVE

ARRAAAAYYYY!!!!! (Oouch!!!)… I shouted this word last September 22, 2012. I was in pain after an accident. My right foot was hit by a hard object. I heard the bang. At first it was not that painful. But after few minutes, it started to swell. I saw the two major parts that were hit—the top lower part of my foot and the middle top. I went home walking uncomfortably going in and out the vehicle to our place.

O yes, I want to say, ‘Why, Lord?’ And again God will answer me, ‘Why not?’ Instead I asked God this way, ‘What is the message or the messages of this accident?’ Then I paused for a moment, I dig down my heart to know the answer. I did not find the answer immediately because my attention is on my pain.

Upon getting off the bus, I saw at the street corner two children lying asleep with no upper clothes, they are dirty. In short, they are one of the street children roaming around the place. Some working people are walking by. Seems that they do not see the pitiful situation of those children. There is a little pinch, no a big punch in my heart. Then I whisper to the Lord, ‘Lord, seeing them is more painful than what I am suffering now.’ Like the people around, I continue walking. And just prayed that I can help these children one day.

I was dragging my right foot while walking towards our home. Sometimes I will hop so as to reach our home immediately. Few meters away from our house, I come across this old man. Seeing the way I walk, he asked me, ‘What happened?’ This old man is our neighbor. Usually I saw him just sitting at the corner alone and sometimes having a good chat with his other old neighbors, friends and families. I seldom greet him maybe because I was shy to approach him. Then on that day, through my injury we had the chance to talk. He insisted to see my foot.  While in pain, I slowly removed my shoes. I was so careful not to press hard my foot. He offered to put oil on my foot and a little bit he massages it. At that time, I felt God’s love. I felt God’s rescuing arm, saying that ‘You are safe with me.’

Then I go home hoping that I will feel better in a while. I had another event to attend to that night. I will watch a benefit concert with my friends. My ticket was paid and they are expecting me to be there. I texted my friend about my situation and asked for her prayer. She said that I would be well after few minutes. I was hoping that it would happen according to her words. I said to her that if this I will be okay after thirty minutes, I would still come. But the thirty minutes became one hour and so I declared that I would not go anymore to the concert.

Lying on my bed and staring on the ceiling, I asked myself ‘What went wrong?’ At home I was alone and there is no one to help me. What made it worst is that my room is located at the second floor. And I have to take the stairs to go to the comfort room. At this time the pain increases and the size of my foot also increase. I felt the numbness of my lower leg. Kulang na lang gumapang ako in going down and up the stairs. The good thing is that there is a rail where I can hold as I go back and forth to my room and to the comfort room. It was hard. There is no one to help me or lift me. Whom I am going to call? I called my God, my savior. Amidst my misery, it was God who came to assist me. He is 24/7 available for me. Yes, of course physically I cannot see him, but the strength I felt that time is enough to know that he is there.

Then I sleep with a prayer that I can walk straight the next morning.

Well, miracles of all the miracles, my prayer did not come true. I still feel the pain of my right foot. I keep on reflecting the message of this accident. And I got answers. First, I need to rest. My plan after my activity that day is to go directly to the concert. That morning I jogged with my students and immediately we had our rigorous physical training. Second, the Lord wants me to go back to him like a child—dependent and trusting him fully. Third, so I can feel God’s love through the people around me. Fourth, I need to be humble. Few days ago, I think my achievements are storing high into my head. I needed to go back on track. To be reminded that it was not about me but it was about God.

I realized that the security and achievements that I am holding this time, in a blink of an eye could be gone. All things shall pass but the love of God will remain forever. God is the only security we can hold on to. He is our stronghold and our refuge. 

It happened six days ago. Although the pain subsided and the swollen part decreased, I could not yet walk normally. I was advised to have an x-ray for this. And I will go to be sure about my situation.

I know in the coming days I will get well. I claimed in Jesus’s name that my right foot would be stronger than ever. But on top of that, my soul, and my character were strengthened. And most of all my faith increased -- to believe and to trust God. I have to patient and wait to the total healing of my foot. I know for sure God saved me through this incident. That is why the Gospel for September 30 is literally appropriate for me. “If your foot causes you to sin, cut it off. It is better for you to enter into life crippled than with two feet to be thrown into Gehenna.”-Mk 9:45.

I am thankful that my foot was not cut off by that accident. But it was a saving grace. Pain saved me as to the suffering of Jesus that saved humanity.  Sometimes we could not understand why do we need to experience pain in life just to get the lessons. We can choose to do the short cuts in the growth of our faith. But there is no real growth if the lessons are not marked with pain. It is a paradox indeed. One thing is for sure, it was because of love. Yes, love that saves. We cannot comprehend God ways but that what makes him God – hard to grasp. Really amazing!

To God be the glory!

GET UP!

“Life will knock you down. You can choose whether to get back up,” says Mr. Han (played by Jackie Chan) from the Karate Kid (2010) movie.
I have watched this movie for several times but it never fails to inspire me every time I watch it. When we have problems we really have the choice to stay there and admit our failure or stand up and start again.
You and I have our individual goals. We want to reach our dreams. But along the road problems will arise. The pains and hardship will be there to convince you to give it up. When situation comes like this, we have to remember the great persons who never give up when the time gets tough. One of the scenes in the movie Karate Kid that I admire most is when Dre (Jaden Smith) still wants to fight even if he suffered injury in his right leg. Mr. Han could not understand while he still wants to go back at the dojo or fighting arena. Then Dre said it is because he is still afraid. He wants to leave the fight unafraid.
Are you afraid? Are you afraid of the challenges? You have to face the fight of life. You’ll never know how close you are the moment you let it go. No one will encourage you but yourself alone. If you choose to get up, you will not only inspire yourself but others as well.
This day I feel discourage. I am thinking if I will just give up my dreams and take the other road. The other road means the way of letting others decide for me. But if I do it, surely I will not be happy. There will be no adventures, no challenges and no results. So I lift up myself once again. I looked back why I have come to this decision. Yes, I want to do something different. To fight against the force that says “You can do nothing” is a great achievement I could have. I know I have a place on earth that no one will claim but me alone.
You are a child of God who deserves to be happy. The advertisement of the soft drink Coca-Cola is very inspiring. The old man advice to the baby is for all of us “Hanapin mo ang makapagpapasaya sa iyo, maikli lamang ang buhay Huwag mong sayangin ang buhay mo sa walang kabuluhang mga bagay. Ipinanganak ka para maging masaya” (Search for the things that will make you happy, life is short. Do not waste your life to those things without meaning. You were born to be happy). We want to reach our dreams because we believe that it will make us happy. On your journey frustrations will come. Focus not on the pain now but to the joy that you will reap if you will not give up.
Get up! You have a beautiful life that is waiting for you. God prepared it for you. Believe that God will be there to help you no matter what. Like Dre in the movie, you will have Mr. Han who will train you to the battle of life and will finish it with victory. You will have God.

SA BUTAS NG KARAYOM (At the Hole of the Needle)

I am using a title in Filipino because the meaning is deeper. It reminds me of the famous line of the King of the Filipino action movie, Fernando Poe, Jr.,“…kahit butas ng karayom papasukin ko” (I will pass through even the hole of the needle). This means that no matter how hard the situation maybe he will pursue or go for it.
I am not here to explain the whole story of that movie. I want to share my experience that just happened recently. Three days ago, I felt different, seems I am in pain inside. There were many forces inside me. These forces lead me to feel empty, in doubt, uncertain, depressed, sad. I asked myself, “What is happening to me?” The moment is like I am struggling to come out in very narrow way. I have to move, to force myself to make space but my effort was worthless. It was also like I am in the dark, I want to hold to something or someone but I could not find one. I am lost, no one is there. I want to cry out loud, help! help! help! but my spirit within does not want to move. I desired to stay and be isolated. I cannot breathe. I felt someone was choking me. It was not a nightmare, it was real. I was lost.

DESPERATE FOR RELIEF
I reached out for my Holy Rosary, Mama Mary would help me. She is my protector. I knew at that moment that other spirits wanted to lead me to something. Suddenly, I gazed the word “suicide” from the open book on my study table. For the past days I have been reading this book about the spiritual journey of a woman. And the latest topic was about the experience on depression. I left the book open after I finished reading. Unfortunately that article is in front of me. I said, “No! No! No”, I will hold on to my God. I started to pray the Rosary and finished it after few minutes. That few minutes were like forever to me. I was in great desperation, wanting, reaching out to someone that would lift me out. I was in the bottom, in the grave, the abyss of melancholic place.

Then I thought of the stories of those who killed themselves. I believed that because they wanted to escape from the pain, they wanted to end it all. But who am I to judge them? Sarah Ban Breathnach, in her book Something More said, When you’re convinced that there is nothing more worth living for and that there never will be—not now, not tomorrow, not ever; when there isn’t shred of evidence that things will ever change or get better (How? Whyt? Says who?) When excruciating pain—physical, emotional, psychic—is so harrowing you’re on your knees begging for release, you don’t want another depic. You want to write only two words: THE END.

I remained in my state of prayer even If I was already done with praying the Rosary. I continued to cry out to God…pray, pray, and beg. At first, I was asking Him, “Why you are making me suffer?” “I cannot bear it anymore.” “What do you want me to learn from this, answer me, answer me?” Then later, I am tired of asking. I told God, “Okay Lord, thy will be done. Strengthen me as I go through this turmoil. Help me to understand.” Little by little my feeling subsided. It was like a strong storm slowly leaving the area of responsibility. No more strong wind. But you will see the evidence that a storm passed by—like the removed roof, the wrecked windows and walls. I felt so devastated. My spirit just wanted to submit itself to her Creator.

THE REDEEMPTIVE MOMENT
Evening came, I went to bed after supper so as to rest early. Then at 11:36 PM I woke up feeling so hot. I knew I had a fever. My lower back is aching crippling my legs. I prayed once again for strength. I tried to get back from sleep but I just tossed around on my bed. Then I dreamed. There was a man who appeared, he looked fair and good looking. He was the typical knight in shining armour (for me). He held my face and I saw his smooth and fair hands. I felt so much loved. And he said, “You are healed”. Then he disappeared.
I wish I could stop the clock. I like to stay there forever. I felt the warmth, the comfort, the serenity and the love. But I have to face the truth and wake up to my real situation. I am on my journey—spiritually I am searching for the truth about my calling. When I woke up, I looked up to the nipa roof of our formation house. Yes, I am back. Although a part of me wants to cling to my dream but I have to face the reality now.
I told myself that probably it was Jesus who visited me. He let me know once again that He is always around to save me.

THE SUN AFTER THE RAIN
I am aware that I am already okay after that incident. The fever was gone. My emotion was stabilized. The heaviness in my heart vanished. It was like I was free from the chain that was put on my neck for many years. Yes it was like years for me. You call it dark night, darkness of the soul but I call it grace. The Lord tested me. He increased my level of faith.

OUR TEAMWORK
I feel I was a winner of an obstacle run from that experience. As I looked back through all the obstruction materials seems that it was impossible to get over. I know I won because God was with me. I remember when I questioned him of many things. I want to know the answers right that moment. Nothing came. I am tired of waiting. So I surrendered, I asked him to lead me on how to get through this test. I realized that I was thirsting for worth, appreciation and love. Then Jesus came in my dreams to let me know that I am loved. He knows the winning plan. He put it into action and I cooperated. The result, we won. Once again it was teamwork of God and me.
It was hard really. I passed trough the small hole of the needle. I was deformed, crushed, emptied, scattered. I am still grateful because after all those things I am still alive. I am joyful and thankful. I do not know what the future holds. There might be more holes of needles to come but I will hold on to my life’s coach—God. For sure I will always be the champion!

PARA SA MGA GUSTONG MAGING BAYANI NG PILIPINAS....ITONG SA'YO!

Excited akong i-share ang nakakamove na mensahe ng binasa kong aklat kagabi..Kapitan Sino ni Bob Ong...

1. "Sinabi ko lang naman gamitin mo lakas mo sa pagtulong sa iba, di ko sinabi na gayahin mo si Mighty Mouse!"

2. "Kung ano yung meron ka ibibahagi mo sa iba, kung ano yung kaya mo ginagawa mo. Yun yon e! Ba't ka umaalalay sa matanda sa pagtawid sa kalsada?Kasi kaya mo. Ba't mo pinupulot ang batang nadadapa? Kasi kaya mo. May lakas ka para itama ang mali, para tumulong sa mahihina.."

3. "Wala akong paningin. Hindi ako nakakakita ng maskara. Kung sino ka talaga, yun ang nakikita ko."

4. "Alam mo ba ng pinagkaiba ng mga bulag at mga nakakakita?...Hindi alam ng mga nakakakita kung kelan sila bulag."

5. "Hindi naman kailangan ang maraming tao para bumuo ng mundo e. Minsan isang tao lang ang kasama mo, buo na ang mundong kailangan mo habambuhay.

6. "Hindi kulang ang kapangyarihan ng tao. Tayo ang kalabisan. Ilusyon. Ipinangdadahilan para sa mga pansarili nilang kapakanan."

7. "Tungkulin mong tumulong sa kapwa dahil may kakayahan ka at gusto mong tumulong. Pero huwag mong kakalimutan na hindi mo mababago ang mundo at hindi mo maililigtas lahat ng tao. Hindi ikaw ang unang nagtangka...hindi ikaw ang magiging huli..hindi ka solusyon. Pero hindi dahilan yon para mawalan ka ng pag-asa at tumigil sa pagbibigay nito."

8. "Gawin mo ang tingin mong nararapat bilang tagapagligtas pero wag mong pababayaan ang srili mo bilang anak ko." (As if God is talking...)

9. "Maging bayani ka sa sarili mong buhay."

10. "Tutulong ka lang sa kapwa...hindi mo kailangan ng pangalan."

11. "Naghahanap ang mga tao ng iba na magliligtas sa kanila. Dahil hindi siya yung iba na 'yon, wala silang ginagawa. Walang nagbabago. Walang may gustong magbago. Naghihintay ang lahat sa iba, yung hindi nila katulad."

12. "Paano ba magbago" Kung gagawa ka ng iba pang pagbabago, kahit maliit, isa sa bawat buwan ng taon."

13. "Sa pagiging Kapitan Sino ko lang naisip na ang tanong ay hindi KUNG BKIT MAGULO ANG MUNDO, kundi KUNG ANO ANG MAGAGAWA KO."

14. "Kung lahat ng tao ay may kapangyarihan, e di sana lahat tayo bayani.
Kung lhat ng tao ay may konsensya, hindi kailangan ng bayani.
Paano yung nadidisgrasya?
Hindi hawak ng tao ang buhay buhay pero hawak ng tao ang kapangyarihan para hindi
pahirapan ang ibang tao.

15. "Wala naman napapala ang bayani kung lalagyan mo ng bulaklak ang puntod niya. Ang
pagrespeto sa bayani, pagrespeto sa mga ipinaglaban niya. Pangalagaan mo ang kalayaan. o ang magandang buhay na pangarap niya para sa lahat."

16. "May kapangyarihan ka, pero hindi mo hawak ang buhay ng tao...Kinatakutan ko ang responsibilidad na pasan ng kapangyarihan. Hindi ko kayang ipangako na hindi ko magagamit ang kakayahan para sa pansariling kapakanan."


Touch? Uhmmmn...sa mga tinamaan nagmistulang fireworks na ang katawan ng bumasa nito..hehe..jokeness..Gusto ko sanang ipabasa ito sa mga gustong maging presidente ng Pilipinas..share niyo sa iba or bumasa na lang kayo ng aklat na ito...Kapitan Sino by Bob Ong...sa susunod ulit..